Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize