He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
