I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Randomize