He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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