Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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