i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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