I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
