i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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