Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Randomize
