Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
