I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
