how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
