btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
