do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
