i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
