What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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