I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
