I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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