we're blogging at a bar
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
