I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
