i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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