Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I hate all girls vehemently.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize