I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
