White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
