it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
