this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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