Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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