no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
