Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
you had me at cake vodka
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
