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No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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