You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
