Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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