Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
