hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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