To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
