no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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