I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
