it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I think your dad took our porno
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
