Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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