Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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