I just pynch a tree in the face
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
