Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
