Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
