WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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