Soap is not a condiment
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
