Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
