fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Who did Billy Mays play for?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So much Jack, so little girl.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize
