Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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