Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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