Duck Duck Cougar?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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