Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize
