Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
