It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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