No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
